If anyone has had family issues you might understand all of this, and i just had to vent…lol
Recently while we were visiting The man of the house’s family 3 hours away, I decided I would dust off my saint wings, lose the ego and decided to just agree to disagree with the DQ. (short for Drama Queen) I knew that it was almost a guarentee that I would be seeing DQ during our visit, since we were all going to the same festival. Knowing this, I thought it was time to make some much needed peace in the family, since it seemed “the rest of the family” were the ones that seemed to be suffering the most after a fall out I had with my husbands sister. I personally could have gone the rest of my life with things the way they presently were. But, that just did not seem fair to the children involved nor the rest of the innocent by standers called family. Ok , I admit I dont hate DQ and we have actually had a lot of fun times, but she has on more then one occasion created un-needed drama within the family unit.
After seeing DQ at the parade and neither one of us speaking to the other, I asked Man of the house where my brother in law was. Man of the house said he was out of town. I quickly realized that DQ and her 2 girls were home all weekend alone and here was the rest of the family sitting around a camp fire having a great time while she was possibly feeling unwelcome to join in because we were in town. It pulled on my heart strings and I felt i had to be the bigger person and try to make amends. Even if my ego was telling me I had done nothing wrong. Here was the opportunity for one of us to make this right.
SO, With my saint wings now on, I quietly without notice picked up my cell phone and made a phone call to DQ. ” DQ, I know we are not on the best of terms, but just because we are camping at your moms house there is no reason for you to sit at home and not come over while we are all having a good time, So, if you want to bring the girls over I am sure Ty would love to see them”
With “The Man of The House” sitting next to me in the truck listening to the message i was leaving I am sure it was all he could do not to wreck the truck. Knowing the situation and how stubborn I can be, it must have shocked him that i was actually making THIS effort. We gave each other “the look” and just went with it. Hubby said ” think positive honey, I am sure it will be fine”… “yeah..OK, we will see” I said. We rode on home and continued on with our day
UNTIL…
I got a voice mail back which i made hubby listen to with his own ears…. Seems DQ thinks it is BEST to keep the DRAMA going…….( insert sarcastic voice here..LOL) YES DQ it is ALWAYS BEST to keep drama going…..and YES DQ it is quite alright for you to BLAME our 12 year old “angry little shit” for all of it, if that is what it is going to take to make you feel better about yourself.
It is very sad when you realize the degree a person will go. But blaming a 12 year old who was then 11 for the demise of a family is about the lowest i have ever seen from anyone in all my years of life. Yep, I admit our youngest can be spoiled at times and can even be a little shit when he wants to be, we are well aware of what a pain in the ass he can be at times….lol …. But fighting with a pesty younger girl cousin is not a reason to shun him from a family… I realize he is not blood but jeeeeshhh is’nt that going a bit far?
So it is with great pleasure to add The man of the house nor I will not be burning the youngest at the stake per her wishes, instead Man of the house hugged him and dried his tears and told him some people just have BIG issues and this is NOT his fault.
Well, at least the dog had a good time. Needless to say I do not think i want to go back for a long long time…. We paid 150.00 for a weekend of drama and I can think of much better ways to spend our family vacation that would bring more joy and peace. It is such a shame, because I really do love it there and I really do enjoy the rest of the family there. But, ignoring the problem does not make it go away, it just makes it worse and sweeping situations under the rug just to please ONE person is not the answer. So, staying away just might be the only alternative to a bad situation.
Maybe next time we will have to go visit my family. Because even with the high level
of dysfunction in my faimly, they would NEVER treat anyone I loved that way, especially a child!
xvmercy
